Image courtesy of Pixabay.com
Every day I hear another horror story.
See another record of a traumatic birth that has left a person, a human being, full of pain and fear and anxiety.
Read another report of a woman’s wishes being ignored, her protests silenced, her body violated and treated as if it were an object that did not belong to her, as if she has no rights at all.
Every day I fight for women like this – not just birthing women, but ALL women regardless of if they are childbearing or not.
I fight for my rights and theirs.
I fight for my daughter’s rights and for all of the other daughters out there who will one day grow up and face the same challenges that we face right now.
I fight in the hope that I can make just enough of a difference NOW so that they won’t have to fight too.
Sometimes someone thanks me for my fighting – for informing them, for supporting them, for showing them that there is another way, another choice, and I feel on top of the world because my words made a difference and helped ONE person.
But it’s hard, so fucking hard sometimes.
Sometimes it feels like I’ve made no difference at all, that I’ve made no progress, that no one is listening or wants to hear what I have to say and give to the world.
And I’m tired.
Tired of the need to fight.
Tired of the fact that I have to even fight at all!
Because in an ideal world I shouldn’t have to fight.
In an ideal world women’s rights would ALL be respected, abided by, followed and given precedence over all policies and personal biases.
In an ideal world every woman would be treated right, would have the help and support that she needs even, most especially, when things go wrong.
A woman should not have to choose between the lesser of two evils because someone else thinks that they know better than she does and should be able to make decisions for her.
She should not have to only be able to choose between bad care and substandard care – she should receive the BEST CARE every single time it is needed and wanted!
This isn’t an ideal world, but the ideal DOES exist.
It is practised every single day by homebirth midwives.
It is practised every single day by the doctor’s and midwives and nurses who practice women-centred care and put their patient’s rights and wishes above their own personal biases and hospital policies.
It is practised every single day by the doulas, lactation consultants, childbirth educators and general practitioners who spent their lives supporting their clients and patient’s and ensuring that they receive the best support, care and treatment possible for their individual circumstances.
The ideal exists.
But it is not accessible to everyone.
It is only available to the select few who are lucky enough to find and have this support and care.
Mostly, it is only those who take action into their own hands and fight for themselves to get the best care possible who actually receive it.
And it breaks my heart that not everyone is able to access this kind of care.
So I will continue to fight...
For those who cannot or will not fight for themselves.
For my daughters and yours.
For the future women who will come after us.
So that even just that one woman can be helped, can be supported, can be treated in the way that she deserves to be treated.
Because you all deserve it this kind of care.
See another record of a traumatic birth that has left a person, a human being, full of pain and fear and anxiety.
Read another report of a woman’s wishes being ignored, her protests silenced, her body violated and treated as if it were an object that did not belong to her, as if she has no rights at all.
Every day I fight for women like this – not just birthing women, but ALL women regardless of if they are childbearing or not.
I fight for my rights and theirs.
I fight for my daughter’s rights and for all of the other daughters out there who will one day grow up and face the same challenges that we face right now.
I fight in the hope that I can make just enough of a difference NOW so that they won’t have to fight too.
Sometimes someone thanks me for my fighting – for informing them, for supporting them, for showing them that there is another way, another choice, and I feel on top of the world because my words made a difference and helped ONE person.
But it’s hard, so fucking hard sometimes.
Sometimes it feels like I’ve made no difference at all, that I’ve made no progress, that no one is listening or wants to hear what I have to say and give to the world.
And I’m tired.
Tired of the need to fight.
Tired of the fact that I have to even fight at all!
Because in an ideal world I shouldn’t have to fight.
In an ideal world women’s rights would ALL be respected, abided by, followed and given precedence over all policies and personal biases.
In an ideal world every woman would be treated right, would have the help and support that she needs even, most especially, when things go wrong.
A woman should not have to choose between the lesser of two evils because someone else thinks that they know better than she does and should be able to make decisions for her.
She should not have to only be able to choose between bad care and substandard care – she should receive the BEST CARE every single time it is needed and wanted!
This isn’t an ideal world, but the ideal DOES exist.
It is practised every single day by homebirth midwives.
It is practised every single day by the doctor’s and midwives and nurses who practice women-centred care and put their patient’s rights and wishes above their own personal biases and hospital policies.
It is practised every single day by the doulas, lactation consultants, childbirth educators and general practitioners who spent their lives supporting their clients and patient’s and ensuring that they receive the best support, care and treatment possible for their individual circumstances.
The ideal exists.
But it is not accessible to everyone.
It is only available to the select few who are lucky enough to find and have this support and care.
Mostly, it is only those who take action into their own hands and fight for themselves to get the best care possible who actually receive it.
And it breaks my heart that not everyone is able to access this kind of care.
So I will continue to fight...
For those who cannot or will not fight for themselves.
For my daughters and yours.
For the future women who will come after us.
So that even just that one woman can be helped, can be supported, can be treated in the way that she deserves to be treated.
Because you all deserve it this kind of care.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Does any of this resonate with you? Want to work with me on your pre-birth mindset? Send a message to arrange a no obligation interview to find out if I'm the right doula for you!
Does any of this resonate with you? Want to work with me on your pre-birth mindset? Send a message to arrange a no obligation interview to find out if I'm the right doula for you!
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